B: "My girlfriend and my children are still at the women's shelter.
I have regular contact with them. When we speak to one another,
I make an effort to stay calm. I accept the current situation and also that
my girlfriend still needs time to work through all that's happened."
C: "I have more to say about myself, to confide and
share about myself, and above all I focus on the problem
of the moment. I now have the courage to admit
that I don't know what to do next. I no longer fight until the
bitter end like I used to."
D: "I approach problems right away,
and don't repress them. That makes arguing simpler,
because it is only about a single issue. I focus my attention on the
parameters, which is to say I focus on the place, time or my own
issues. If I notice that a fight is escalating, then I break it off.
When things have quieted down, the problem can be
discussed again. Also, I don't always have to be right."
E: "At the moment, I only have theoretical
knowledge. I can't put it into practical use, because my wife
doesn't want to have anything to do with me."
F: "I no longer feel responsible
for her arguments and actions. That takes the fire out of the argument.
I try to comically exaggerate my situation, to imitate the comedian Loriot.
When it gets serious, I say how I'm feeling."